View Full Version : Song of Songs -- Frater's Fresh Translation Faithfully Rendered from the Original Hot Tongues

02-27-2007, 12:13 PM
The translation isn't complete yet, but I thought I'd give a quick preview and teaser of how the work is going....

Chap. 1

"Oh, let him keep kissing me with the kisses of his lips!
For thy love tastes far better than wine!
Thine oils, they do smell so sweet!
Pouring oil sounds the name of thine!
That is why the ladies love thee!

[Second Station]

Beckon me to come to thee!
And let us chase one the other
For my King brings me to his secret chamber!


We are enthralled with thee!
and you do so exite!
We savor thy lover better than wine to be
They do love thee aright!...........


I am darkly tanned and beautiful!
O daughters of Jerusalem
Like the tent skins of Kedar
Like the secret veils of Shaloahmon
Do not stare at me because I am tanned!
For the Sun has tanned me!

My Mother's sons have been cruel to me
But they are the very ones from whom
I was made to take care of Vineyards

So I need to take care of my Vinyard!

Chap. 2

Like a red apple tree in the Trees of the Woods
So is my Lover among all the men
Under his Shade, I saw such great delight
And knelt down on my knees
And his Fruit tasted so good on my palate!

Just tell me this, O my soul-lover
Where is that spot where you Bishop you Lamb?
Where is that spot where you make her lie down
At midday and noontime?

For how should I too go astray
and wander off like all those other sheep
of your passionless male peers!

If you do not know, fairest woman of all
Let your fingers walk down my pasture trail
And then guide your young feminist goats
to the tents of real Bishops!

02-27-2007, 01:04 PM
Feel free to critique. If you can think of a better rendering, let me know.

As for myself, I think it's sassy, baby!

Yeah! :-P

Like it's supposed to be!

--Fra OH!

02-27-2007, 10:11 PM
The fellatio part seemed a bit impersonal, or almost like she was a bit insane. Maybe flip the situation around I think it would balance things out. But thats just me :-)

02-28-2007, 09:41 AM
LaDominio wrote:
The fellatio part seemed a bit impersonal, or almost like she was a bit insane. Maybe flip the situation around I think it would balance things out. But thats just me :-)

I understand how it may strike the ear. In this portion, the Bride actually does sound a little crazy. It's because the sense of the wording is that she is more than a little frusterated with the cloistered misunderstanding concerning sex among her generation.

This is a very rough first draft. I'll think about your words. But, I keep thinking that I want to leave it a little edgy, a little bit raw, because that is how the Hebrew idiom is worded.

I keep thinking too that this really needs to be a 'Convergent' translation. It is emphatically postmodern, but it's beyond than that.

I believe that this translation is meant for this time most especially.

The O.I. has attempted to 'steal' this 'Holy Grail'.

Strange as it may sound, there are mysteries contained therein which speak to that very issue.

I believe that a correct understanding of the usage of Song of Songs has been lost for centuries, and well may have never been understood in full at all.

I state again, Song of Solomon is the Manual for achieving Unity Uttermost Shown on every level. It works on every level of human existance for all ages, at all times. To know and to follow its Mystery, it to achieve unity with all creation. It is the Manifestation of YHVH in Unity with All.

It is time for a pronounced sexual revolution in Xristentry. It is time for the Sons and Daughters of Hierusalem to once again 'project' the Light of Light.

The translation is working out in a very peculiar fashion. It has elements of classical Elizebethan English, and yet can move quickly to extremely postmodern idiom.

In short, it makes no 'logical' sense. The translation moves as the feeling and poetry allow.

It is meant to be a New Aeonic (i.e., moving toward the Aeon Aeonion of Xristos) translation that both transcends and unifies the collective soul and History of English.

And therefore my approach is Convergent. For knowlegdge is being raised and expanded throughout all quarters. This is a time that is neither, pre-modern, modern, or post-modern. We are becoming Convergent. The Masks are coming off. The Old Empire of the Novus Ordo Seclorum is crumbling as we speak.

It is this little book that I foresee as causing no small earthquake once the hoodwinks are taken off and humanity again awakens to its beginnings which have been visciously robbed from them.

The real Mystery is that Satan never had anything to offer in the first place.

All Mysteries of Salvation, Wisdom, and Power were ever prophecied in the Old Covenant and fulfilled in the New Covenant.

It just so happens that YHVH, LORD of Heaven and Earth, the God of Truth, the God of Life, also happens to be the God of Holistic Sexual Exstasy.

And I'm going to prove it through a well needed translation of this long lost gem.

03-02-2007, 09:02 AM
I agree. Much work need be done about this issue, as it is probably one of the most important systems we know of. And it is currently being disregarded. A quagmire lies in its place a quagmire that they tread over like lost slaves.