Thread: Ritual Abuse
View Single Post
Old 11-08-2005, 05:26 AM
igwt igwt is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,391
Default Ritual Abuse

Reprinted from Usenet.

>> I wanted to share an article that I believe is both inspiring and
>> courageous, by someone who is in the process of healing from ritual
>> abuse. This article is being reprinted here with the permission of the
>> author, Kim Campbell. My hope is that it will help educate as well as
>> give hope to others. svali
>> Note: This article contains discussion of ritual abuse and
>> Christianity.
>> April 1999
>> My name is Kim Campbell. I am a forty-nine year old man living in
>> Tulsa, Oklahoma. I am happily married; I practice medicine as a
>> Physicians Assistant, and I am a member of Morning Star Testimony
>> Church, Tulsa. Over the past several years, I have also learned how
>> very true it is that I am a Christian by choice.
>> In April 1993, I learned that I was DID.[dissociated identity
>> disorder] I learned almost immediately that I was born into a satanic
>> family and was raised in the culture known as SRA [satanic ritual
>> abuse]. To say the least, my deliverance from this culture was a major
>> test in my life. The past several years have been difficult, but I
>> believe I was substantially resolved about three years ago. But the
>> crisis of my life has marked the beginning of an authentic faith in
>> Jesus Christ as Redeemer and Lord of my life, something I have deeply
>> desired but that has eluded me all my life.
>> This short essay is my testimony, which I first wrote in 1995. I want
>> this to be an instructive piece for Shield of Faith Ministry of
>> Minneapolis, who has invited me to speak and share with them this
>> coming May. I, most of all, offer this as a testimony of the Lord
>> God's love for me and for all the rest of the Body of His Son. I am
>> utterly amazed at Him - Father, Son, and Holy Spirit - and His
>> rightful commitment to His own glory as God, a glory that He delights
>> to share with me as His son. Me, of all people!! Amazing grace,
>> indeed.
>> In my satanic ancestry, I came from two families. My public family
>> were hardy West Texans who taught me how to tie my shoes, do
>> arithmetic, be polite - all the normal things most parents do for
>> their children. A knowledgeable observer would have seen the
>> depression, the switching, and the disordered attachment behaviors,
>> but in a way I was fortunate. I escaped being misdiagnosed as ADD
>> [attention deficit disorder] and placed on Ritalin. For all
>> appearances, I was a typical (although very odd) child.
>> However, beneath this public veneer, I lived as a direct descendant of
>> a very old culture, which has survived in an underground form for
>> several thousand years, a culture as old as mankind itself. In this
>> culture, people worship satan as god, and the form of the worship and
>> the entire lifestyle, as old as it is, is steeped in deep violence. As
>> a participant in this culture, I was exposed to every abuse, trauma,
>> and demonization imaginable within satanism. The culture is
>> unbelievably and ingeniously evil; virtually everything about this
>> culture is humanly damaging. And I responded in the same way children
>> do (and would) in this culture. I dissociated.
>> Over the course of my life I experienced trauma as an infant to
>> sharpen my dissociative potential, coerced violence both as victim and
>> perpetrator, high-tech medically-based mind control programming here
>> in the US, often in government facilities and clinics, and at the
>> Tavistock Institute in the UK, and participation (via indoctrination
>> into the Kaballa, culminating in a series of occult initiations) into
>> the oldest, most pristine form of satanism, the old Sumero-Akkadian
>> Babylonian mystery religion. Layer after layer, all these
>> disaggregated identities were built and crafted to become my
>> personality.
>> Inherent in this culture is the presence and power of demonic spirits,
>> and they became an integral part of my life and even my being. In a
>> culture addicted to power, demonic spirits offered the ultimate power
>> trip. If, in American culture, people are addicted to comfort, status,
>> and prestige, in satanic culture, people are addicted to demonic
>> power.
>> Satanism has pervaded western civilization. Satanism is the foundation
>> of all we would regard today as paganism in ancient and contemporary
>> forms. It has been growing for thousands of years, quietly weaving its
>> way through the very fabric of the culture and the power structures of
>> the nations in the West. It has adherents in all walks of life, in all
>> incomes, and all social strata. It has exerted a profound influence on
>> the intellectual life of the west for the past several hundred years.
>> Their thoughts and writings have shaped Western civilization from the
>> Greek philosophers through Augustine, Aquinas, the christian mystics
>> of the thirteenth century, and much of the charismatic movement of
>> today. Descartes, Spinoza, Kant, the philosophers of the
>> Enlightenment. and many others arose from satanic culture. Polynesian
>> religion, animism, spiritism, American Indian religion, Mayan and
>> Incan culture, ancient Egyptian culture, and Greek religion all grew
>> out of satanism. To think that satanic culture is only about abuse is
>> a fundamental misunderstanding of satanism and the role of
>> dissociation in human history. Satanism has influenced politics,
>> economics, art and music, through the spiritual-psychological process
>> called dissociation, and dissociation is as old as human culture
>> itself.
>> This was the culture in which I was born and raised. And to say the
>> least, this culture is antithetical to the Kingdom of God, and I was
>> born into the ongoing battle between these two cultures. Even though I
>> was also a functioning satanist, I was also a seminary graduate (M.
>> Div. 1976). While professing to be Christian, and my public life
>> showed the discordance of living in irreconcilable cultures. My love
>> for the Lord was hollow, as I wanted to love Him and be loved by Him
>> deeply, but I was unable to resolve my fears and doubts as to His
>> existence and character. While my public life was filled with outward
>> relative success, my spiritual and interpersonal life was marred with
>> failure.
>> The emotional shock of learning of my SRA/DID was profound, but it
>> launched me on a path which I could only call discipleship. For the
>> first time in my life, being and becoming the Christian I wanted to
>> be, took first priority in my life. It would be very hard, very
>> difficult work, but I knew that getting free of the occult and the
>> dissociation was my work as a disciple of Jesus Christ and that I
>> would have to do it as a Christian. If I were to rely on the even best
>> methods and techniques of psychology or psychiatry, neither I nor a
>> traditional therapist would have enough money or lifetimes to work
>> through this mess. Even today I have yet to know of a traditional
>> approach penetrating the deeper cores of an SRA personality. If I were
>> to be free, I had no choice to be free except by Jesus Christ.
>> Because of this, I took my discipleship with Him extremely seriously.
>> Time after time He called me to holiness and insisted on the power of
>> His love - through the forgiveness in His Son - to deliver me from the
>> power of sin. Day after day, after work and in lieu of "living
>> normally", I stayed home to read and pray, to exorcize demons and
>> reclaim my humanity, to communicate and fuse with accessible
>> self-states, and afterwards come to terms with the reality of my life.
>> I read and went to conferences to learn all I could about MPD, ritual
>> abuse, and the work of healing, so I could apply this to my own
>> deliverance. I went to Church to hear from the Lord, since my Father
>> chose to use "the folly of preaching" as the ultimate in cognitive
>> restructuring. I went to corporate prayer where the presence and the
>> power of the Lord worked visible miracles in my and many other
>> peoples' lives. And I scrutinized my entire life in the light of the
>> Living Word of God. Every sin, whether from my conscious self or as
>> passive influence from other self-states, was rigorously subjected to
>> the sanctifying work of the Lord. After all, SRA/DID is sin par
>> excellence, and as a sinner, I needed repentance and forgiveness most
>> of all. As it turns out for me, discipleship has been deliverance.
>> When I reached an impasse or when the obstacles were too difficult for
>> me, I would schedule a session with my pastor, Doug Riggs, and the
>> power and love of the Lord God would come through this man. Rather
>> than do endless interviews with alters or focus on abreactive work,
>> the Lord would lead us on deep penetrating raids down through my
>> layers into the primal events of my personality. The work consisted of
>> vigorous exorcism, prayer for my Father to connect me with my other
>> self-states, and a Biblical existential counseling about the impact of
>> SRA on my life in the light of the Person of Jesus Christ. Through my
>> pastor, the Lord could take me far deeper than I could go on my own.
>> Through him, He could speak His specific, contemporary word of grace
>> to me as a dissociated man. And through his voice and touch, my Father
>> could be real to me. Many times the Lord gave my pastor knowledge or
>> strategy that was essential in resolving those crises. The Lord works
>> though people like this (and many other great people in the Body of
>> Christ) for people like me. The Lord is not in the least intimidated
>> by darkness; after all the Gospel is that He loved me while I was
>> still in darkness. The Lord has been doing all this in the setting of
>> a small, apparently insignificant local Church of thirty or forty
>> people (including children), most of whom are SRA or at least
>> dissociative. We had come together to live in such a way as to hasten
>> the Lord's coming for His Bride, but we also had been constituted in
>> the occult to frustrate the will of God for the Church and bring in
>> the antichrist instead. As Christians we have prayed for each other,
>> counseled each other, and admonished each other, and as satanists, we
>> have controlled and done violence to each other. In "working out our
>> salvation with fear and trembling", many times we have been forced by
>> the Living Word of God to remove planks from our own eyes while we
>> fumbled to remove cinders from each other's eyes. All this is the
>> Lord's refining us into a repentant people. The Living Christ has
>> worked in this Body Life, just like pre-crucifixion Capernaum or
>> post-Pentecost Corinth.
>> So the Lord worked in the life of one of His disciples. Bit by bit, my
>> heavenly Father was progressively delivering me, literally, from the
>> moral and demonic power of sin by the person of His Son, the Risen,
>> Living Jesus of Nazareth. All through the experience, I was becoming
>> astounded at the grace and power of God through His Son.
>> After eighteen hard months of work and counseling, the multiplicity
>> persisted. The Lord had told us to be bold. Both in what I read and in
>> what I heard, I realized that my biggest obstacle was myself, not just
>> the hidden internal me but the conscious external me. Frankly, I was
>> afraid to learn how bad I had been and perhaps still could be. So the
>> Lord impressed me to confront those very things about myself that I
>> feared the most.
>> It was worse than I had thought.
>> My concept of SRA was that insane or frankly evil people took nice,
>> good children and turned them into satanists. I was wrong. Hiding
>> under the surface layer that we had labored eighteen months to
>> dismantle was the real, genuine core of my humanity as a satanist. The
>> truth was that the defining reality of my childhood (perhaps fifty
>> percent of my preschool waking hours) was being incested and
>> indoctrinated into a Sodom and Gommorah culture within a brick West
>> Texas two bedroom house; these aspects of myself had little need to be
>> abused in ritual, as I already was living, growing, and worshiping in
>> the 'normal' of an occult pagan culture. All the splits and
>> experiences I had recalled, renounced, and reconciled up to that point
>> in the first eighteen months were but a window dressing - a
>> protective, therapy-defeating maze to protect this central,
>> substantial aspect of my self. I had stepped into the living reality
>> of my generational core of evil. It was more than merely a demonic
>> deposit for me; it was my very world. In my being I was an historical
>> descendant and perpetuator of my ancestors' incest, violence, and
>> idolatry. And as such I was as intensely demonized as the worst of
>> Canaanites.
>> The Lord's grace has been an amazing thing. Whether or not anyone else
>> does, my God and Heavenly Father Himself absolutely believes in the
>> efficacy of the sacrifice of His own Son on the cross for the totality
>> of my evil. As much as I have been repulsed and disgusted with myself,
>> the Lord's love and kindness toward me did not change. Rather, it
>> became richer, deeper, and more powerful. The Lord Jesus refused to
>> call my sin anything other than what it was; He allowed no excuses, He
>> tolerated no irresponsibility on my part. He didn't need to cut me any
>> slack or allow me to cut any for myself, since His sacrifice and new
>> life was more than sufficient to deal with my sin. So, I began to
>> learn first-hand that evil isn't the greatest power in the cosmos. As
>> the grace and power of God freed my faculties to hear and believe, I
>> could grasp the larger picture of His relationship to me. Only with
>> that encouragement could I continue looking at the truth of my life
>> and continue on the path of deliverance.
>> This, then, was the structure the Lord uncovered . First was a surface
>> presenter system, a "good me" of personalities that worked,
>> functioned, learned, married, divorced, and lived as a Christian; this
>> was also "the me" that committed to do the work of remembering. Next
>> came the external dissociative shell; this was the residuum of all the
>> violence and demonization that happened to the presenter to make the
>> multiplicity more elaborate. This was the part that would wear a
>> therapist out, appearing to make progress but leaving the generational
>> core undetected and undisturbed. Deepest still was my ancestral,
>> generational core, the historical continuation of a family and culture
>> that had been living in Sodom and Gomorrah for generations completely
>> oblivious but opposed to everything "the good (surface) me" had known
>> as good, true, and real.
>> The attachment theorists would say that people are defined by their
>> bonds, and I believe this is true. My core of identity has been marked
>> by the emotional, affective attachments to the key figures in my life.
>> This core is my original identity, made up of the bonds and affective
>> ties to those closest to me. My mother was indeed Lula Vieta Pauline
>> Russell Campbell, born 1917 in Farmersville, Texas, and died in 1977.
>> My real, biological father, was not the man I had known as my father.
>> My true father, the man whom I loved and called father, was Edouard
>> Phillipe de Rothschild, and I was his bastard son, named Phillip
>> Eugene. This man, Edouard, was my father and I, a product of occult
>> incest, was one of the hundreds of thousands of both legitimate and
>> illegitimate offspring of this powerful financial and occult family.
>> What was it like living in this household? During much of my childhood
>> and adolescence, I lived with my father on his estate in France. I can
>> remember his talking with me as a young boy, I remember his love of
>> life and his passion for everything human. In his soul he believed
>> that humanity was god itself; he could talk for hours (and often did)
>> about the phenomenal accomplishments of the human race. He would take
>> me to his library and spend long periods displaying the miracles of
>> being human. I loved his passion. I loved, too, the physical
>> relationship we had, held fast in the emotional power of incest, which
>> in this culture was "normal" and to be admired. I listened to and
>> adopted his lusts for power and even his hatred toward God. This man
>> relished hating God, and I was his bastard son. Such was the true
>> generational core of my ancestral iniquity and, being a Rothschild
>> descendant, it was maximally demonized.
>> So how does a child of such a family become a Christian? A peculiarity
>> of satanic families is that they introduce their own children to the
>> Gospel, in order to attack the very relationship that is the emotional
>> core of genuine faith. I recall my father, with none other than Herr
>> Josef Mengele himself coaching him over his shoulder, leading me to
>> Christ. His first awkward attempts often misfired, earning him (of all
>> people) a tongue-lashing par excellence from Herr Doktor. But one day
>> he succeeded; I saw the miracle of God as my Father, and my heart went
>> out to the Holy One as my Father, my "Abba". Then by distorting the
>> message of the Scriptures, they lead me to "put the old man (the
>> unregenerate human nature, in Pauline theology) to death". I did
>> undergo death, an induced physical death followed by a medical
>> resuscitation. Then I, a tender child just over two years old, was
>> given the "choice" to love my Heavenly Father who led to death, or my
>> earthly father who meant life. Over a protracted period, my father
>> reinforced both yearnings - to be the Lord's and to be his. He built
>> in an incredible tension in me between these two diametrically opposed
>> affective bonds, and I was not allowed to dissociate them to achieve a
>> reconciliation. This was my core conflict - an attachment disorder of
>> the first magnitude; out of this conflict emerged, through structured
>> abuse and medically driven behavioral conditioning, everything that
>> was my alter system.
>> Thus, the very origin of my identity as a Christian and the most
>> wonderful and pristine experiences of my receiving the presence of the
>> Holy Spirit and the Eternal Life of Christ, were within hours,
>> sequestered off, thus no longer available as the central organizing
>> focus of my personality. These were the primal attachment experiences
>> from which my Christian identity was built, but through being
>> re-indoctrinated back into satanic culture, they are the events upon
>> which my entire SRA edifice was constructed.
>> I was present at my father's death in 1988, receiving his power and
>> the commission to carry out my destiny in the grand conspiracy of my
>> family. Like their other children, I played an key role in my family's
>> revolt from God. When I watch CNN, it startles me to see so many
>> familiar faces now on the world stage in politics, art, finance,
>> fashion, and business. I grew up with these people meeting them at
>> ritual worship sites and in the centers of power. Financiers, artists,
>> royalty, and even Presidents, all these dissociated people work and
>> conspire today to bring in a new world order where being human is the
>> highest good and God is a faceless abstraction. These people, like me,
>> are SRA/DID. Like the hundreds of thousands of this occult family's
>> other biological children, I had my place and function within this
>> clan's attempt to control the world. My efforts and my families'
>> efforts strove to have a member of the European nobility of the
>> Hapsburg family assume the preeminent position over humanity, a
>> position called the Antichrist by Christianity.
>> While others were seeded into government, academia, business, or
>> entertainment, my place was within the Body of Christ. I was to be a
>> focus for spiritual power and controller of a cult within this Church.
>> In this Church have lived people who I have known all my life to be
>> the controllers and power centers of both the Rothschild family's
>> false prophet and the antichrist. I was dedicated in my childhood and
>> groomed all my life to protect this vital link to the false prophet's
>> and the antichrist's ancestral, spiritual power. All of us borne from
>> satanic families and groomed for complementing roles for decades - all
>> brought together as a local church to use the very Body of Christ as
>> the means to bring in the false prophet and antichrist - amazing!
>> Many dissociated Christians in the Body of Christ hold similar
>> corporate spiritual, occult positions as part of the satanic new world
>> order. In my being I embodied the luciferian morning star within the
>> Church. I represented the presence of all the other satanists who were
>> related to me in the morning star; their spirits were present in me in
>> the Church. Constructed through ritual but empowered by legions of
>> spirits, I was a human and spiritual focus of corporate satanic energy
>> into the Body of Christ.
>> My Rothschild family built my corporate spiritual occult position as
>> the morning star and the very foundation of my entire system on my
>> personality as a Christian. And not just as the false, programmed
>> hyper-pious, hypocritical, or superspiritual Christian of my presenter
>> systems. No, the deepest center of my core as a Rothschild satanist
>> was my acceptance of Jesus Christ as Lord while I was a mere child at
>> the tender age of two years and four months.
>> This has been supremely critical in my deliverance and in my life as a
>> Christian. This event - my conversion to Christ - is the central
>> defining event of my life and personality; I deeply believe it is the
>> foundational event of my life. Deprived of this defining event and
>> identity, I had been stripped of the most important behavioral pattern
>> or "template" of my Christian faith and as such had lost the single
>> most important organizing element of my personality. I can only
>> speculate how my deliverance would have been facilitated if we had
>> worked on my biological and affective Rothschild identity and my
>> childhood conversion as the very first primal dissociative events to
>> be resolved in my counseling. Had we resolved my conversion and the
>> experiences around it as my very first PDE at the start, I believe my
>> entire system of dissociation would have been stripped of its central
>> demonic, psychological, and biological power and would have nearly
>> collapsed.
>> I am not in any way unique in my "system" or experience. In many
>> others who come this far in their deliverance - all of us have had a
>> similar structure and similar experiences. All us received Christ in
>> our childhood and were subjected to strong affective conflicts in our
>> attachments to God and to our true parents to such a degree that we
>> split and were enveloped in kosmokrator legions; the alters who
>> elaborated from this split were the satanic foundations of all other
>> alters within the entire personality system.
>> For the Rothschilds, and for satan himself I am sure, this was the
>> ultimate sadistic irony in using Christians to bring in the
>> antichrist, but there is a certain demonic brilliance to it. By
>> seeding the Body of Christ with his occult followers, satan has been
>> able to generate the spiritual and sociological forces that are
>> required to bring in the false prophet's and the antichrist's reign.
>> This conspiracy also retards the Body of Christ from growing to the
>> measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ and satisfying the
>> heart of God for His people. From these satanist infiltrations both
>> inside and outside the Body of Christ spring the demonic energy, the
>> heresy, and the actions that will culminate in the great apostasy of
>> II Thessalonians 2:3 and then the revealing of the son of lawlessness,
>> the antichrist.
>> Within all the mainline churches, the ecumenical movement, the Word of
>> Faith movements, elements of the Vineyard Movement, and especially
>> within the charismatic heresies of a "spiritually resurgent" Methodism
>> and Presbyterianism (among others), - within the whole 'Christian
>> occult' of the 'unity through signs, wonders, and miracles' movement
>> that has arisen from Oral Roberts' heresy and ministry - within all
>> this, satan has been fulfilling his delusion to be worshiped as god.
>> The visions and messages these people put forth are the demonic
>> projections of lying spirits expressing themselves through the mouths
>> of lying prophets, and the miracles are acts of sorcerers who don't
>> know either the Father or the Son. The Lord Jesus spoke about such
>> false prophets in Matthew 7 saying, "Many will say to Me on that day,
>> 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in Your name, and in Your name cast
>> out demons, and in Your name perform many miracles? And then I will
>> declare to them, 'I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice
>> lawlessness.'" (Matt 7:22,23) As sincere as people in these movements
>> may be and as wonderful, ecstatic, or sublime the experiences may be,
>> these movements aren't from God. For good reason "judgment begins at
>> the household of God". Through SRA/DID satan has infiltrated the
>> church with his false prophets, complete with counterfeit spiritual
>> gifts, and has practically hijacked the church for his purposes.
>> So, not only are the political, social, and economic foundations for
>> the antichrist in place, but the spiritual and religious foundations
>> are already firmly in place, as well, inside mainstream Christianity.
>> This picture of a world going to hell and dragging the church with it
>> is indeed a bleak one but the Scriptures are unmistakably clear that
>> the period just before the Lord's coming will be like this. To think
>> that the Church will be anything other than a small enduring remnant
>> in an age of deep violence and darkness is an utter misreading of
>> Scripture.
>> The Lord God is no fool. His foreknowledge and the grace that flows
>> from His Being are more than sufficient for the real Body to endure
>> and withstand such evil. My life is living proof of that. What else
>> can deliverances like mine and others, done in such a place as this
>> small church, signify except that Jesus Christ is alive and well,
>> indeed?! What else does it mean that He sovreignly chooses to give
>> "the unfathomable riches of Christ" to the lame, the crippled, the
>> despised, and the shattered by making us His covenant people "in order
>> that the manifold wisdom of God might now be made known through the
>> church to the rulers and authorities in the heavenly places"!?
>> (Ephesians 3:8,9)
>> The victory hasn't ultimately been in the overcoming of the demonic
>> and dissociative bondages of this satanic conspiracy. I think that the
>> real joy of the Father is that, to overcome such deficits and
>> accomplish such a task, we have been brought by the Lord God Himself
>> to a moral victory over satan and everything in his power through our
>> relationship with our heavenly Father and with each other. This moral
>> victory is seen in the love we have for each other within this small
>> assembly.
>> The obstacles are indeed formidable to getting free of ones' demonized
>> satanic roots and in faithfully enduring as the world goes to hell in
>> a handbasket. But all this is worth it, because our Father has, out of
>> this morass, built a corporate people who have, in our very beings and
>> relationships, defeated satan morally and spiritually. From this
>> struggle - both personal and corporate - the Lord is realizing His
>> desires "...that they may be all be one; even as Thou, Father, art in
>> Me, and I in Thee, that they also may be in Us; that the world may
>> believe that Thou didst send Me. And the glory which Thou hast given
>> Me I have given to them; that they may be one, just as We are one. I
>> in them, and Thou in Me, that they may be perfected in unity, that the
>> world may know that Thou didst send Me, and didst love them, even as
>> Thou didst love Me." (John 17: 21-23)
>> The real Christian life and the Lord's will for me that eluded me so
>> long because of my multiplicity, has come to me, because by the grace
>> of God I chose to overcome the evil within me. "...He who overcomes
>> shall inherit these things, and I will be his God and he shall be My
>> son." (Revelation 21:7) Despite the manipulation and betrayal, my
>> childhood decision to trust in Jesus Christ was right. There is
>> nothing special about me; I am no Christian superman. There are people
>> in this small assembly and others who have displayed greater
>> persistence, courage, honesty, and humility. There are many others,
>> both dissociative and non-dissociative, in other churches whose
>> response to His call to discipleship has led them to extraordinary
>> depths of suffering and love in the Name of Jesus Christ; of such the
>> world is not worthy.
>> All my life the Lord has called me, just as He has been calling to
>> everyone else, to trust and obey. How could I say, 'No' to Him?? How
>> could I ever?! The Father's Son and His grace have boxed me in and
>> taken me captive. His claim over my life was what preserved enough
>> hold on reality to believe that He really exists, that I owe Him my
>> life and love, and that His grace is greater than anything that exists
>> within this age or any other.

Reply With Quote