Re: The Mind.
Oh, I have looked. In fact, the handful of memories that were STUCK in my head since a very young period are what always led me to believe that I had been abused at home first. But, the brain's defense mechanism created an amnesic wall. The memories were traumatic and, therefore, the beginning, the end were not always attainable.
There is an opening and I'll continue looking; however, sometimes it is much easier not to because, although, a pedophile is a pedophile, there is a certain amount of pity I feel for both parents in that I believe they were products of their environment before the age of five and suffered horrendous abuse.
If we say that these people are sick and they know not of what they do; if they are what they were born into; if they can act one way in the presence of others and another when they are fulfulling their "deviant sexual behavior," how then do we make them see right from wrong?
Can they ever? Will they ever? This was always the dilemna for me.
At a very young age, knowing it was wrong and believing in my heart that those who were inflicting their "immoral" behavior upon me could change if only I could make them see.
I wanted to marry, have children and break the cycle of abuse. I wanted to prove that it could be accomplished. That I did not have to BE as they were.