To clear a misunderstanding. My children have been brought up to see the two-faced's. They do not belong to that club.
That's what makes this all so difficult from a standpoint of raising children, IMHO. Children must be taught to recognize the dualism and hypocrisy -- often most flagrant in the authority figures of the community, i. e., teachers, police, even clergy -- and even interact with it, yet not respect or emulate it.
As scripture teaches, "To be in this world, but not of it."
That's an almost overwhelming responsibility for a parent, especially with peer pressure such an intense force in juvenile development, as thokhanCep observes. To send your little lambs out amongst the wolves every day and hope they come back to you unblemished.
God must be helping you, Mary, because it seems like too big a job for man alone.