The conversation with him and his ilk in the past went something like this:
You would ruin his career?
Why should I care about his career?
He didn't care about me. He didn't care about abusing me, watching me be abused, torturing me, sending me away to get tortured?
I'm suppose to care about him because he's rich and famous and it doesn't matter what he did to me because I'm not.
I think there was an offer of money. You'll never have to want for anything. He'll take care of you for the rest of your life. Life of luxury. Something about a trust fund.
That's not what I want. You think that money can make up for what HE and THEY did to me?
You think this will make it all go away? You think this will make the scars heal? You think this will make my memory come back? You think this will comfort me? You think I want your dirty money? You just want me to sign on the dotted line and put a gag order on me.
This will never happen.
You think money can buy my silence?
What if he winds up going to jail?
I don't care where he goes. Did he care where I went? Did he care where he sent me?
I was punished for crimes inflicted on me and HE and THEY were not.
If I were ever to call him a "sadistic pig," he would say, what did you say? Come here to my face and say that? Don't you ever let me hear you say those words again.
If I were to ever use the word pedophile, the same would happen.
At first, during memories surfacing, I couldn't say the word pedophile without clenched jaw and trembling lips.
I'm underage, I would say. He is not a teenager. There is a law about this.
So, I am saying again, I don't care what his FATE is.
How can he make it right? I was asked. He can't make it right. He'll never be right. He's not right.
He's a victim, himself, they would say. I'd say, well, he had his chance and he chose to remain a victim.
Once on HIS site, there was a message to me:
"GIVE ME MONEY."
A memory of a trust fund waiting for me if and when I were to awaken.
I find it truly amazing how I am able to recall with great detail, the names, the emails, what was said, who said it, etc. while I was on HIS site even though I was in an altered state of consciousness.
I have purposely left out the names of the posters.
This speaks to photographic memory.
What I had before they tortured me, created amnesia, drugged me and tried to destroy me.
This speaks to how I was able to report to the OTHERS before I was almost turned into a vegetable.
I find it amazing how I am able to recall conversations with HIM from the past, now that I'm not in an altered state of consciousness and being mind controlled as I was on HIS SITE. Now that I'm not being "triggered" into sexual programming/disinformation. Now that I am in control of my own mind.
Yes, there are INTRUDERS here, but I can spot them a mile away. I am no longer suffering from the emotional, psychological and mental abuse that THEY left me in not once, but TWICE.
I remember telling HIM in the past that if HE ever messed with me again, HE would be the one who would face interrogation. He would be the one who would have to answer questions.
I also remember telling HIM that he took something that could have been beautiful and turned it into filth.
How he could have sought help. How he could have been a WITNESS.
He chose the alternative. For what? Fortune and fame!!
This is very difficult for me to write because the results that HE/THEY, those persons on his site, involved in the "covert" operation against me, wanted was for me to be DEAD.
That's all there is to it. Nothing more and nothing less.
They can't KILL me themselves so they were hoping I would either suicide or be left in a "psychotic state." They traumatized and fractured me all over again.
First, you must understand that a "mind control" victim is highly suggestible. And, when one is back under the control of her/his handlers, whatever activity they desire for you to engage in can be coerced through suggestion.
We already know that I was in a child-like state, out of touch with reality, my family, my friends, isolated and under their control. I was in a dream world/fairy tale world of lies and disinformation.
In this particular thread that I have talked about, the drinking of alcoholic beverages was the topic. It was a LOUNGE and it was on an island. It was a make-believe scenario for me.
For the record, I am a modest drinker, but they were pouring this and pouring that and posters would be asked, what will you have tonight? This was ongoing for months.
Outside of this thread, other threads would be set-up on Friday/Saturday nights and drinking was the topic as well. Conversation and drinking. All in a very polite manner. All so sweet and cute with one another.
What'll it be tonight?
Some posters talked about drinking regularly in their homes. I'm going to have this tonight or that tonight.
So, anyway, I found myself drinking. My husband commented that I was drinking more than he has ever seen me drink before.
He was right. I have never before, since my marriage to him finished an entire bottle of wine by myself plus some.
This became frequent.
They were aware that I take an anti-anxiety medication and I am of the belief that alcohol poisoning is what their objective was.
Remember, they watch me. They listen in. They know when I'm leaving my house and when I return home.
What are you drinking, they'd ask? What's your favorite drink?